Menopause and Me - the missed period

Menopause and Me – the missed period

In April I’ll be fifty one, the last year seems to have sped past and gone in the blink of an eye.  2019 has started off with a strange happening, the start of the end of something. Menopause and Me – the missed period.  The only missed period I’ve had since I was put on the pill in my teens, other than the times I fell pregnant.

It’s a rather strange feeling.  I’ve known I’ve been peri-menopausal for ages.  You might recall the post I wrote about the menopause and me last year.  Well since my last post I’ve had more hideously heavy periods and a couple of more normal ones.  I’ve even had one that last two weeks. That was nice. Not. But I’ve still always had something, but this month my due date has been and gone and a couple of weeks on top of that and still nothing.

I did feel really rather unwell a couple of weeks ago, sick and totally without energy which came from nowhere and lasted a couple of days.  It happened at around the time I should have been due to have a period.  Was that some weird thing going on with my body and menopause?  Maybe just a coincidence.  I’ve felt sick and faint before, a few days before I’ve come on over the last year so maybe it is all tied up.

Although I know this has been coming, and I’ve got past the point of wanting another baby, it’s rather weird to know that my body is changing in such a fundamental way.  Something will no longer be working in the way I’ve taken for granted for all of my adult life.

I like being in control of most things, if I’m totally honest.  I remember the elation I felt previously when I missed a period, and knew that I must have been pregnant.  But to miss a period after all these years and know that there is no way on earth you are pregnant.  That this is different, that this is a new chapter.  I thought I was prepared, but I’m not sure I am.  It’s like knowing that you’ve got to leave somewhere you know you can never go back to.  The decision not within my control.

Menopause and Me – the missed period.  It’s a strange one.  Sod’s law of course that I’d only recently stockpiled my supply of Super Plus Tampax as I was getting through so many of the damned things each month.

Menopause and Me - the missed period

So what happens now?  I’m not sure how I’m going to cope with having no idea of when or if I’m having another period.  I’ve kept track of my cycle since I came off the pill in December 2008.  Now I have no idea what’s happening. I’ve done a bit of Googling and it looks like I could be in a state of limbo for the next three to five years on the period front.  Joy.  So I’ll make sure I carry my tampons with me everywhere and just pray I don’t get caught out with a heavy period when I least expect it.  Trust me, you have no idea how heavy a period can be until you get to this age! Fingers crossed and I’ll keep you posted on my progress.

If you’ve got any experience that you’re happy to share then please do.  It’s an unknown road I’m travelling on right now.

12 thoughts on “Menopause and Me – the missed period

  1. A candid post. Thank you. My periods finished age 45 with a hideously and embarrassingly heavy one and, although I was prepared for more for many months afterwards, they never happened. Had my periods not stopped, I wouldn’t have known that I had gone through the menopause as there were no other symptoms whatsoever.
    I had not wanted more children but was surprised at how resentful I felt that the choice had been taken from me. Once I got through that feeling, though, the situation became liberating.

    1. Thank you for sharing your experience. I can relate to the heavy period issue, I’ve had such awful ones that I’ve not wanted to leave the house in fear of flooding again and again. You were lucky not to have any other symptoms though, I could really do without the emotional rollercoaster here. Yes it’s a very weird feeling knowing that your body has made a decision for you isn’t it.

  2. What a coincidence, I’ve posted about the menopause this week too. I don’t suppose the next few months and years will be that straightforward, but I hope the menopause isn’t too bad for you.
    I am the complete opposite to you – periods have always been few and far between for me. They didn’t start again until my eldest was 16 months old, then I managed to conceive my daughter before they’d even started after my younger son was born! I had just two periods in 2018. I am now on HRT, as well as the pill, which seems a bit crazy. But I’m only 45 and too young to come off contraception.

  3. My periods finished when I was 46. There was no tailing off or intermittent ones, they just stopped.
    I suffered from night sweats and daytime ones! It’s like a switch ‘bang, you’re hot!’
    I also had awful mood swings lots worse than the usual PMT.
    The sweats and moods lasted for a couple of years.
    Wishing you a smooth journey!

    1. Thank you Soosie, I struggled with the heat last summer when normally I’m more than happy in super hot temperatures but I’ve not had sweats like you and others have mentioned. Perhaps I still have that ‘joy’ to come. The mood swings are awful though, I can be so horrible to live with at times.

  4. At 43, i’m quite looking forward to no more periods. Having decided (along with hubby) on no more children, i don’t see the point in periods. Mine are historically painful and heavy which is why im on the pill. Dont want to come off it. I know i should prob embrace the menopause (body’s done its job etc) but i dont want the symptoms!

    1. The symptoms aren’t pleasant, but everyone seems to suffer in different ways. I thought I’d had heavy periods until the last couple of years, honestly super plus didn’t even do the job well! I just want it done with now, it’s like being in a holding bay isn’t it, waiting to see daylight at the end of it all. Good luck when it does reach you

  5. I feel for all of you going through it. It’s hard enough being a woman and having the inconvenience of periods as it is from start to finish for all those years, to then suffer even worse ones before they stop. Mine have always been all over the place anyway but light (even though on warfarin I expected them to be worse), but I’ve no idea what kind of age I’ll go through menopause because my mum had an early hysterectomy so I’ve not got her real age starting it to give me a clue. I’m definitely not looking forward to the hot flushes though. I always feel hot as it is, so any worse will not be good.

  6. Mine have been all over the place for about 3-4 years now. I haven’t been dreadfully caught out thankfully – yet. Because they are heavy I tend to get cramp and bloating, so I know it’s on its way, although not usually precisely to the hour. I then have incredibly heavy flow for only 3 or 4 days and then it’s all but over. I don’t even keep a record now, I just go with gut feeling – but I have been caught out without any sanitary towels left in the house when I’ve had them come in quick succession, so that stockpile isn’t a bad idea!!

    1. Mine came from nowhere yesterday morning, two months after the last one. Thankfully before I went to work and it hasn’t been a horrifically heavy one yet. I’m just making sure I have supplies in my bag all the time now. All good fun isn’t it.

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